Friday, January 21, 2011

Did you miss me? I have...

Feels like forever since I blogged and it's only been three days... 
Much to my surprise - I've actually missed it.
Wednesday I was completely bed bound after I didn't react too nicely to the new medications that the doctor gave me for my sinus infection and vertigo. Which meant Thursday I had to work insanely hard to get my orders ready for delivery this morning.
As I packed party bag after party bag into the wee hours... my mind was was all about this blog. I've surprised myself how much I've enjoyed pouring thoughts and memories onto cyber paper. I've also enjoyed getting to know you all much better through your own rants and tweets.
But that leads me to what do I write about tonight? Now that the work week is over and now that my head doesn't feel like it's been clamped in a vice. I've blanked....
This week my spirits have been very low, not only was my illness dragging me down but self doubt in my abilities in my gifts & talents. I've been feeling a bit drowned by life and circumstances of late and everything has been spirally downwards. I sat here in front of the computer asking myself what you would want to read about? Start a sentence... stop, erase.... start a sentence... stop... erase. But then I realized it's not about what you want to read that's important right now (no offense), it's what I need to hear about myself-from myself that I need to write. 
I need no-ones validation but my own. But why is it that I am the last person to give it? I used to have such confidence in everything I did, when did I start questioning myself - where did that vibrant 20 year old go?

Memo to self:
I am talented. I am contributing to life. I am worth every minute. I am unique. I am beautiful. I am needed. I am loved.
I am me and no one is better at being that than me.

Empowered? Ummm... don't know, feels a little Oprah momenty. But honestly does feel good to say it out loud. It's a start.
I started thinking alot about what I've accomplished this past year, when asked to blog about my photography. I know I've overdone it- multi-tasking my arse off - Hopefully I learn from my mistakes, and find the right point to say no. But flicking back through my photoshoots, reminiscing I am now understanding that I also need to look into the past and find greatness there to encourage me to keep moving forwards. 
So tonight I've looked back at many facets of my life, and I am finding my pride in the process.
I've shared 50 facts about me before, but tonight I thought I'd share just 8 things I love doing. Hoping to not come across to self-indulgent... this is me:
Business Owner
Events Designer/Coordinator
Photographer
Graphic Designer
Fashion Designer
Muralist
Amateur Cake Decorator
And most importantly (which is why I left it till last) Being Mum to my Gorgeous Brood and partner to my gorgeous man!
xxxx

7 comments:

  1. The vibrant 20 year old girl is still there. Just a busier on with more commitments.
    Maybe, rather than saying yes to others, say yes to getting reacquainted self.
    It is empowering. I'm going to post you something this week to help.
    XxxxxxX
    p.s Yes, missed your blog updates.

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  2. Trini....I have loved reading your blogs and I find it quite timely to tell you that just this morning I was raving about all your talents to my mum. I was at her house so I could not show her the blog so I showed her the facebook photos of your photos, cake decorating and party organising abilities. We were in awe....you are amazingly talented. Multi-tasking? You are the queen....I do get inspired by you! I look at those parties and think - amazing - I know my kids would love to be over there playing with their little 2nd cousins....(or whatever number cousin they are.) Take care of you!!!!! Love Ness

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  3. Thanks Ness, glad to hear that you guys are reading it to (makes me feel very special) love to all the fam...We love Singapore, but it's the worst thing about living overseas is missing family and friends (could you imagine the touble that Lachie & Lachie could get up to?!?) please keep on reading and commenting - love to hear from you!

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  4. Dear Trini,
    Lovely to read your blogs, another talent being honed (ie writing). Keep up the good writing, looking forward to seeing your thoughts on al sorts of things. (Though I think I remember you saying something about your daily doings, but your thoughts are more interesting than the "got the milk" sort of thing.) Mum

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  5. Mum- that was my original plan, but fate has it that if I did talk about daily doings, all I'd be talking about is my recovery and kids driving me a bit nuts whilst on school holidays... so have deviated from the plan a little. I do plan on alternating daily life into memories, stories, photos etc... so keep checking this daily (hey... I'm doing pretty good for a girl that cannot keep a diary)xxTrini

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  6. Just figured that it is less time 'til the next party than it is to the last party. (23 days approx) so time to starting the countdown! M.

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